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How to Choose the Right Adult Dating Site

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A roll in the hay. A bit of crumpet. Afternoon delight. Whatever terms we might use for sex, we are but human and as such most of us have sexual urges. Love’s all well and good, but sometimes you just want to meet up with an attractive guy or girl, a friend, a couple or even a group, and let off some sexual steam.

Adult dating websites (also known as Sex Dating Sites) provide a range of tools to find hook-ups online. They’re now big business, with millions of horny members around the globe, all looking for some no-strings fun.

These websites are suitable for all sorts of people: whether you just want to flirt online, find saucy friends to share your fantasies, try cybersex, meet up for erotic rendezvous, or even have a discreet affair, all of this – and more – is possible.


How Do We Compare And Contrast The Products?

We’ve reviewed over 100 adult dating websites, comparing and contrasting what they offer their members. Our reviews include a star rating, giving you a quick visual impression of each site’s capabilities, but we also provide details on the costs and search parameters each site offers, plus a breakdown of their key features. In addition, we provide a write-up on each website (which we call the Editor’s Verdict), going into some detail about the pros and cons of each service.  

Each sex dating site differs from the next, and there are some key differences which you should be aware of before jumping into the action...


Chances of getting a date

We consider the likelihood of your being able to find an online or offline date. The websites we’ve reviewed all offer communication tools, allowing you to communicate with other members. However, some sites can be plagued by fake accounts, so you may receive messages which are simply trying to get you to spend money elsewhere. These are usually to be avoided, or at least treated with a decent dose of skepticism. 

For the most part, however, you should be able to browse adult dating sites without false interruptions. Consider what kind of dates you might be interested in, or open to further in your process. Sending emails or instant messages comes as standard, but some adult dating sites also allow you to talk to members using your webcam. This is going to be particularly useful if you want to see and hear the person you’re chatting with, and things could get more intimate if you’re in the mood.

Offline dates and real-life hook ups are also a key reason why some people use these websites. If you’re hoping to meet attractive individuals, couples of groups for sex, seek out a website which promotes this. In particular, forums, events pages and chat rooms will help to build a sense of community where you can meet like-minded people and discuss the possibility of hooking up.

Meanwhile, some adult dating websites cater to sex fetishes or discreet affairs. If you’re interested in pursuing a particular kind of relationship, we recommend looking for a website which embodies and encourages that particular lifestyle.

In short: it all depends on what you want. If you’re happy with flirting online, most sites will cater to your needs. However, if you want to chat using a webcam, or arrange offline hook-ups, you’d be better with a site which provides appropriate features to support you.


The features a site offers will impact on your overall experience, as well as how likely you are to find a date. As we mentioned, email and instant messaging tend to be pretty standard features. You will also be able to build a profile with photos (often nudes if you prefer), and some websites allow you to upload videos.

Aside from profile building, there are many features which will vary from one site to the next. If you want to watch adult movies or live shows performed by erotic models, seek out sites which offer those as benefits. Some websites also include shops where you can buy toys and DVDs, or purchase gifts for other members. 

For anyone looking to hook up offline, we’d recommend looking for a website which offers plenty of community features. These may include forums, chat rooms, events planning, events calendars, tour/vacation planners and more. 


Quality/Size of Members’ Photos

On sex dating websites, photos are the main way of showing off your looks, fantasies and sexual preferences. A good photo is key, then, to attractive some positive attention and improving your chances of hooking a date. We check the photo allowances provided to members, including the file size and potential content of photos.

In addition, we consider the quality of other members’ photos, and whether they are able to upload collections. Some adult dating sites also allow you to upload secret photos, which won’t be shared with the general members and can only be accessed by individuals who request your permission. If you’d like to build a database of your favorite photos from different members, this is also a feature provided by some websites.


Help files / technical support

If something should go wrong with your account, help is necessary. We examine each site’s FAQ and customer support options, preferring those which provide plenty of immediate help which you can access for yourself, as well as options for contacting support staff. Most of the sites we’ve reviewed are easy to use and navigate, but if you struggle with browsing or are fairly new to adult dating websites, you may wish to seek out an option which scores highly in the “ease of use” category.


Ease of use / navigation

When it comes to flirting and communicating online, you want the process to be as smooth as possible. Nothing quite ruins the atmosphere like your connection being lost during a cam session, after all. Look out for websites which are simple to navigate, particularly if you’re not too confident in using dating sites. We also consider the range of search parameters which are available, and how well filtered or presented your search results appear. 

If you’ve very particular sexual preferences, you might wish to find a website which provides a lot of search options. This will allow you to really narrow in on people who match your sexual appetites, social penchants and more.


Ease of joining / registration

Most sites score highly in this category, since they often make sure that signing up is as painless as possible. However, dating sites often require you to provide more information about yourself, since this is used to build a profile. Whilst we recommend completing a profile with as much information as you can (to improve your matching and search results), some may allow you to skip the process and complete it later, which can be useful if you want to explore the website before putting the time into building your profile page.

Another important element to consider is whether free trials are indeed as free as they sound. Some sites will over a free or small-charge trial period, which then upgrades automatically to a fully paid membership. Some people are caught out by this, figuring that trials will simply end, then are stung with a big monthly bill.


Value for money

When considering whether a site offers value for money, we think about everything a site offers its members. A cheaper site isn’t necessarily offering good value for money if you can’t find a date, for example. We prefer adult dating websites which provide a great host of tools, helping you to find a date for an affordable and reasonable rate. 

Most of the websites we’ve reviewed here will offer a monthly fee, which varies depending on the features you desire and the length of your contract. Others offer a pay-per-use system whereby the site membership is free but you have to pay for each message you send or each video you watch. You’ll need to consider which system is right for you and your wallet.


Niche Sites and Specialist Sites

As the popularity of internet adult dating grows, providers have diversified into offering users not only the traditional “general” adult dating sites, but also a number of specialist and niche adult dating sites. Niche sites offer the opportunity for users to get in contact with specific types of people – either a specific category or group, or individuals with specific interests – which should give you a great starting point when getting in contact with other users.

Some users find that niche sites start off a relationship with a common interest or desire, or highlight from the start what the intentions of other individuals are. Others feel that by limiting the users to a particular niche from the start, it limits the opportunity for users to meet people with new interests. We’ll leave this one up to you – if you find a site that you really like, with the sort of individuals you would like to meet, it’s the perfect opportunity to start up a great relationship, regardless of the niche.


“Powered By…”

A common feature of a number of sites is that they are “powered” by another, larger site. This simply means that the site shares the features, structure and often, membership directory of the parent site. Many users find this a comforting element in choosing a site to join, having the security of a major site and being able to search through and choose from the millions of users that can sometimes exist on larger sites. Others will just want to cut out the middle-man and join the parent site directly. This practice is relatively common, so don’t be concerned when you look at a site which is “powered by” another.


A Note on Privacy & Safety

One of the biggest concerns that came as part of the expansion of the internet is the privacy and safety of individuals who use online adult dating sites. It is certainly a notable concern with online profiles on dating sites holding a large amount of personal information. We have highlighted in our reviews which websites offer additional privacy protection, but most websites offer the opportunity to block users from viewing your profile or apply additional privacy settings to your profile (to make your photographs or videos private or password only, for example).

Many sites offer an additional safety measure that involves a process commonly referred to as “ConfirmID”. This process allows users to submit a copy of some form of ID, have an ID check through their credit card details, or have the accuracy of some information (profession, income, geographical location, age etc.) confirmed to other users by providing evidence to support such assertions. Generally, only the larger sites such as Adult XXX Date and Adult Friend Finder offer such advanced services, but we do think they are worth paying a little extra for if you are particularly concerned about safety and privacy.


The Bottom Line

Dating is a numbers game, and online adult dating is no exception. The larger the number of members on a site, the greater your chances of scoring a hot date in your local area. Also, with more members comes more variety, and so your chances of scoring multiple dates or finding your perfect sexual match are also greatly increased if you join one of the more popular adult dating sites. It is for this reason that we put great stock in the size of the members' database of each site when compiling our reviews. That’s about everything we have to say for now. So, go forth and enjoy yourself! There are plenty of like-minded adults out there hoping to find you for a roll in the hay, a bit of crumpet, some afternoon delight... you get the idea.